Almost five years after the first cases of COVID-19 in China, I finally got it.
Honestly, I expected this test to be positive for flu. My husband and I had been testing COVID negative on rapid antigen tests for days. I knew I was sick and getting worse, but really, I expected flu.
But no, it’s COVID. Fortunately, I got this positive test within the first five days of being sick and so I was able to get Paxlovid. My husband was already outside the treatment window. And let me tell you, Paxlovid made such a difference. My fever was gone in 48 hours and and my congestion was gone by the time I finished the medication.
Yet I am recovering very slowly. I feel ok, and then as soon as I get up and do something, I feel terrible. I’m writing this post in little dribbles, quitting as soon as I start to feel brain fog and exhaustion.
This is very familiar. It feels like I did after radiation treatment. It feels like ME.
I’m not upset that I feel so weak and wobbly. I’m not even upset that I got COVID despite all my best efforts to avoid it.
What upsets me is that this is yet another delay in my writing. What upsets me is that I began the year with breast cancer and am finishing it out with COVID.
The hard experience of the Long COVID community teaches me that I must be oh so very careful right now. I cannot rush back to physical or cognitive activity, because that is where the danger lies. I must give my body the time to fight the effects of COVID, in hopes of avoiding chronic issues. I’ve always wondered if that would have been good advice when I first got sick all those years ago.
You might think that I would be used to this by now. After all, I’ve been riding waves of higher and lower functionality for decades. But even after all this time, I am still not used to having my plans ambushed by my body. I still have not learned to gently pivot. I am better at it, but I am not graceful.
One thing I have learned in the last year is when to surrender. COVID has waylaid my writing plans, and I have no choice but to give my body what it needs.
I’m so sorry you got Covid after working so hard to avoid it. As always, thank you so much for writing about your life. I hope your husband is doing OK.
Thank you, Rivka! We are both slowly on the mend.
This has been such a difficult and convoluted year for both of you!
I hope your return to baseline is as smooth as possible.
You (both) are in our thoughts!
Here’s hoping 2025 is smoother and with more upbeat events/moments for all of us.
Rest rest rest, dear friend.
So sorry you’re going through this. It seems we never get used to being in the doldrums, even after decades.
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
Take your time and rest well! Sending love.
You are right to rest as much as possible. I suffered really bad worsening of ME for about 9 months following covid, and 2+ years later I’m still not back to baseline. Take care of yourself!
Hope you feel better soon.